“Well, once you get to know them…” 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

“Well, once you get to know them…” 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

I’ve had a lot of people over the years say things in response to my writings about people being creepy or weird or gross, like, “If you bother getting to know them, they are often pretty cool people—just like you and me.”

And it’s bothered me for a while.

But I couldn’t put my finger on exactly why.

And today, it came to me.

It’s not about “getting to know them,” it’s about THEM getting to know YOU.

Because for many of those people, it’s only once they actually SEE YOU AS A PERSON worthy (by whatever standards they use, like fuck-ability or usefulness) of being respectful and considerate to, that they will actually be respectful and considerate.

Another way of putting it is that it’s not about you seeing them as human.

It’s about them only treating you as a a human when you have responded to them in a way that pleases them.

What are your thoughts?

Am I wrong? Right? Why or why not?

More Posts


Validation: A Human Need

Over this past weekend, as I was in Jacksonville to teach, a writing of mine popped back up for a spate of attention. The Needs

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

Protocol 101

What is protocol and why do you need it? Not all protocol is bowing and kneeling and “yes, Sir,” and so on. Protocol can be

Read More »