A few months ago, I was having a conversation on the Men’s Dominance forum I participate in, and one of the men asked:

Isn’t it normal for work and life to suffer when relationships are not going well?

Well, yes, that is normal. Since when do you want to be normal?

Letting the success of all of your life be determined by how successful you are in your current relationship is a poor goal and a poor excuse. Worse, it puts pressure on your relationships that they don’t deserve to have:

“If you don’t keep me happy, my work will suffer,” is the unspoken communication. “If you don’t love me, my life will fall apart,” is another.

To me, that says less about the quality of your partner’s ability to love and relate and more about yours.

Seriously, do you really want the kind of relationship that requires you to lose your work balance or your time with friends, or whatever?

How sustainable is that?

Are you willing to put your career on hold for a week to fix things? A month? A year? Forever?

And even if you are, is that a GOOD relationship for you?

A mentally healthy lifestyle?

Might it be better to choose a relationship that supports your work and life passions as well as grows in intimacy and joy?

Maybe.