Writing Prompt: Feminism In Today’s World—OR—Why “Feminism” As A Word Is Tainted, In My Opinion

Feminism: Graffiti on a wall in Jamaica shows a woman chasing a man with a club.

A friend sent me this video a few days back:

It’s a good one. Eliza VanCort obviously knows her shit, and as a communication geek, I picked up a few ways of thinking and speaking about communication that I didn’t have before.

Some of the video made me cringe, though.

Continue reading “Writing Prompt: Feminism In Today’s World—OR—Why “Feminism” As A Word Is Tainted, In My Opinion”

Let’s Debate: Is Cinderella A Good Role Model?

Cinderella: Stop Blaming The Victim

I watched this video a few months back, and it gave a different side to the Cinderella story—one that shows Cinderella as strong, capable, and authentic.

What do you think?

Is Cinderella a good role model for girls because of her persistence in the face of adversity, or is she just a meek, timid woman waiting for the white knight (prince) to rescue her?

No, Your Culture Does Not Get To Dictate MY Pleasure: The Orgasm Gap

Orgasm Gap

I’ll admit, I still don’t get the Orgasm Gap thing, even though I’ve written about it before.

In this post, the quote I picked up on was:

“According to both the books I’ve read on it, the orgasm gap exists primarily because our culture still overvalues penile pleasure and undervalues clitoral pleasure. “

What does culture have to do with when you are in bed with someone?

I mean, you may overvalue penile pleasure (and for me, there is a LOT to be valued), while I value my clitoral pleasure a great deal. Continue reading “No, Your Culture Does Not Get To Dictate MY Pleasure: The Orgasm Gap”

Dating: Who Messages First?

Dating: Is It Men Versus Women?

On a FetLife group about dating on OKC, the question was asked:

Who messages first?

According to a new study done by the OKCupid team, they stated that more messages happen when she sends the first message. What are your thoughts on this study? What do you feel would be the best course of actions to pursue a mate? What is your thought from the perspective of the opposite sex?

So I responded:

So, I did an informal dating study last year about exactly this (I was doing research for a kinky dating book I’m writing with a co-author). Here is what I did:

Set up an account almost exactly the same as my personal account, different pictures, but still my face, etc.

Wrote about the same thing, but different words. Continue reading “Dating: Who Messages First?”

The Problem With “Women Don’t Want Sex As Much As Men”

Men Vs. Women In Bed

Someone said in a conversation I’m in:

Those sort of atitudes, still alive in the 21st century, create a wall of misunderstanding and distrust that every man has to negotiate… <snipped>

And every woman.

Ever been in an argument, and had your partner tell you “I didn’t do X because you would do Y, and I didn’t want that,” and you were standing there wondering who the hell they think you are, because that was NOT your reaction? Continue reading “The Problem With “Women Don’t Want Sex As Much As Men””

About My Privilege—Especially Pussy Privilege

Pussy Privilege in Dating

I have privilege. In many, many ways. I know this. Not all ways.

Growing up, we were never rich. I never had the cool clothes. I was never part of an “in” crowd. I went to public schools, whatever was around. I didn’t go to camp, or take part in educational extra curricular activities…

Unless you call tromping around the woods catching critters like a wild child ‘educational extra curricular activities.’

I kinda do. LOL! Continue reading “About My Privilege—Especially Pussy Privilege”