Last Updated August 4, 2021

This site is you (yes, you), and it’s up to you to make it the safe(r), amusing, fun place you want it to be! Here are some pointers for all you kinky daters out there:

Safe(r) Space

Dating Kinky is intended to be a safe(r) space for kinksters, poly, queer, trans folk, and anyone not-quite-vanilla. We are not a SAFE SPACE. We are a safe(r) space, and do our best to:

  • Eradicate hate speech
  • Focus on consent
  • Respond to reports and concerns

We are currently working on building a set of guidelines for handling reports, safety, and consent issues. Once it’s ready, we’ll announce it and post a link here.

Adults, Y’all

By using this site (or any other Dating Kinky related sites, like our community groups, educational events, or Discord server) in any way, you assert and agree that you are at least 18 years of age, and legal to view sexual content.

Play Nice

We want all y’all to have a good time here, so let’s be polite and respectful to everyone, alrighty?

  • Be polite. Remember — your future date may be here, too! Be kind, thoughtful, and considerate in your interactions with fellow members. If you have an issue with another member, or any posted content, please report it (all content and profiles have easy-to-use reporting features), and we’ll do our best to resolve it.
  • Recognize the good work other members are doing with a simple please and thank you. Everyone loves a good pat on the back, after all!
  • It’s easy to misinterpret things online, so let’s not assume bad intentions: some of them will think differently than you; or English might not be their first language; or their kid will have spilled a glass of milk on the cat a second ago; or they might not understand the particular nuances with which you speak. Or…who knows? A willingness to forgive will go a long way, especially when directed towards new members who might not yet have fully learned what effects their actions have on others.
  • If you spot something not-so-nice going on in Dating Kinky, do your part and report it. Seriously. Even if it may be nothing. We’d rather know than not know.
  • “Hey, c’mon. Play fair!” Remember that nagging voice of your childhood best friend when someone cheated? Well, it was for a good reason. Creating multiple accounts, spamming, posting duplicates or nonsense answers are forms of cheating the community. Please don’t do it. We are not about points or winning, so let’s put helping each other make connections at the top of the list.

Share That Know-How

Everyone has a little Einstein in them, so there’s a good chance someone could use your knowledge, opinion or experience. Don’t be shy to add to a discussion. Just make sure it’s something that hasn’t been posted before – duplicates make things a little harder to sift through.

Recognize Brilliance

  • See a great post? Say so with a comment.
  • Please give credit where it’s due. If sharing work that’s not your own, please give credit and a link. You’d want the same done for you.

Get Consent

We don’t police you and what you do, because we know we’re all adults here. Just get consent for things like sending explicit photos as attachments to chat.

In video chat, you might want to be naked. In text or audio, that’s not so much of an issue. In video, though (like in our social lounge or as a PLUS Member on our site), it does matter.

  • There is usually a table or tables specifically set aside for nudity, and people who enjoy looking at it. (If you don’t see one, ask a DK mod to create one for you.)
  • You are welcome to join other tables as long as your camera is always kept focused away from explicit bits (those include butts, genitalia, and breasts). And while DK does not agree with the shame around nudity, our credit card processing companies, app stores, and other corporate entities DO. And frankly, we’re about creating a space where people value consent, regardless, and many people (even in kink) are not comfortable with random nudity/explicit images.
  • If you are naked, please don’t constantly proclaim this. No one really cares.

Be a Straight Shooter

  • Like mama always said, honesty is the best policy. Please don’t misrepresent stuff (like your identity or credentials). Authenticity is the name of the game here.
  • Don’t be too shy to ask tough questions or reward the honesty of others. As long as you keep things respectful, everything should be sunshine and lollipops. Maybe even rainbows and unicorn glitter farts.

Keep Private Stuff Private

  • To avoid having to repost a question (because we’ll delete it), keep personal information, like your phone number, birthday, website, email and home address to yourself. Some things are just meant to be handled one-on-one, you know?
  • Email account-related issues to us instead of posting them in the Community to keep your info safe and private.
  • We do what we can to remove content with private information. If you happen to see any being posted, please do your part and let us know with a quick report. It could help save someone a bunch of trouble!

Keep DK Stuff Private

Dating Kinky is a space for you to share and explore parts of you that you might not be willing to share on other social sites.

Or with family members.

Or with your co-workers/boss.

So, we ask that you respect that others also wish for privacy. In that spirit:

Don’t share things from DK chat without asking.

Exceptions: Anything posted by DK publicly, or non-specific memes shared across the internet.

  • Even if things are publicly accessible (like videos or blogs or twitter screenshots of a personal account), it’s good form to ask about sharing first, just in case.
  • Exceptions: Anything posted by DK publicly, or non-specific memes shared across the internet.
  • Feel free to share content, like in “Overheard on DK” anonymously. Better, ask the person you’re quoting if they’d like to be credited, and how!

Getting the Most out of the Community

There’s a handful of ways you can contribute to and benefit from the Community. Read on for some great tips on everything from getting quick answers to gaining cred. They might just blow your mind…or at the very least, expand it slightly.

Asking Questions

  • Ask questions with as much accuracy and detail as possible.
  • Relevant and clear titles are key. It makes it way easier for others with the same question to find and you’ll get a quicker answer. Woo hoo!
  • Include any relevant search results you’ve come across. The magic word is “relevant” – links to “Literal Videos: Total Eclipse of the Heart” and “Sloth Dubstep“ won’t really help most people.

Answering Questions

  • Do your best to be clear and concise and stay on topic. If it helps, eat a snickers beforehand (just kidding…kind of).
  • Avoid duplicate answers to keep things clear and uncluttered for everyone. Avoid duplicate answers to keep things clear and uncluttered for everyone. Avoid duplicate answers to keep things clear and uncluttered for everyone.
  • Don’t guess. This isn’t Jeopardy!, so there’s no shame in not knowing the answer. Posting incorrect information or fantasy wank material makes things harder for others to find their own place in the community.
  • Play nice. If someone gets a tad nasty, feel free to leave a friendly reminder that we’re all here to help each other. If it gets out of hand, please send a report!

Naughty Stuff (Reporting a No-No)

You’re our eyes and ears! If you think a member isn’t following the Community guidelines, report them!


Everyone deserves a second chance, but please don’t push us! To keep our Dating Kinky amazing, we won’t hesitate to remove you if you’re being a jerk and intentionally breaking the rules. Although we’re pretty sure 99.9999999% of you aren’t going to do that, please report it if you do happen to see any no-nos.

Disrespectful or Hateful Comments

“You smell and your hair looks fat!” Well no, that’s not true, but just proving a point – it doesn’t feel too great to be talked to like that, right? That’s why we have a zero-tolerance policy for attacks on other members. That includes attacks based on race, ethnicity, religion, disability, gender, age, sexual orientation or gender identity. We don’t have to sing Kumbaya but, you know, just be cool.

Bullying, Trolling or Harassment

A disagreement isn’t a good excuse for bad manners. It’s okay to debate respectfully – let’s work together to resolve conflict and understand each other. Helping make Dating Kinky better will make you feel all warm and fuzzy, trust us.

Heckling, badgering and continuing to talk to people after they’ve expressed that they don’t want to talk to you is just another kind of harassment: don’t do it.

Bad Language

Let’s keep the ****ing potty mouth out of it, including abbreviations or scrambled words (e.g., f*** you, fcuk). Just kidding! We don’t mind colorful language.


High-quality answers make the Community more helpful, so don’t post duplicate questions and answers, solicitations, off-topic content and random gibberish. OUFJEIJOIJOFIGJHOFIHE!!! See, it doesn’t help.

Banning Members

  • Dating Kinky reserves the right to ban any member for any reason.
  • Dating Kinky reserves the right to delete and archive any content.
  • Dating Kinky reserves the right to remove the Community at any time.
  • Members with more than one account can be banned.

Anything Illegal

  • Posting anything that infringes on the law, copyrights or registered trademarks isn’t allowed.
  • The same goes for tricking people into sharing personal information.
  • This includes things that are illegal where we are, even if they are legal where you are and vice versa, at our and our legal counsel’s discretion . This is to protect ALL of our members, we are sure you can appreciate that.
  • More on this in our Terms of Use.


Dating Kinky is not responsible for the answers provided by community members, including owners, moderators, customers, representatives and employees.


  • Dating Kinky reserves the right to withhold information.
  • Dating Kinky reserves the right to share information with the authorities, especially in pursuit of protecting our members.
  • Dating Kinky is not responsible for any personal information on public community pages.


  • Dating Kinky reserves the right to change and update the guidelines and rules in order to maintain the community’s effectiveness.

Moderator Decision-Making

  • Administrators have the final say on things, but if something you post gets removed without warning, we’ll share the reason with you, if you ask.
  • Creating threads or content that question or reference potential or past administrative decisions are not permitted. If you have a concern, you can let us know directly. Posting publicly on the community just causes trouble and is less efficient at resolving problems.
We reserve the right to remove content that:
  • is considered likely to disrupt, provoke, attack or offend others.
  • is racist, sexist, transphobic, homophobic, abusive or otherwise objectionable.
  • breaks the law or condone or encourage unlawful activity. This includes breach of copyright, defamation and contempt of court.
  • advertises products or services for profit or gain.
  • is seen to impersonate someone else.
  • includes contact details such as phone numbers, postal or email addresses.
  • contains links to other websites which break our editorial guidelines.
  • describes or encourage activities which could endanger the safety or well-being of others.
  • is considered to be ‘spam’, that is content containing the same, or similar, message posted multiple times.
  • is considered to be off-topic for the particular topic.

If you don’t feel that you can abide by our Community Guidelines as outlined above…

…maybe Dating Kinky isn’t for you. We’ve crafted these guidelines to ensure that everyone within the Dating Kinky community has a good time.

You may also want to check out our FAQs and Privacy Policy. If you ever have any questions or comments, we’d love to hear from you. Please feel free to drop us a line.