Dear Poly Partner…

Dear Poly Partner…

I need to get something off my chest.

I told you not to cancel with [YOUR OTHER PARTNER] because I never want to be resented for forcing your hand. Because I don’t want [YOUR OTHER PARTNER] to feel like I do when I get second place on a double booking.

Not because I don’t want to be put first on this very important occasion, or to be given the priority when an error is made. I do. Oh, god. I do.

That’s not my decision to make.

It’s yours. It will always be. I want you to do what you need to do.

Either way you choose, it will be tough on you. And I’m sorry for that. If you stick with [YOUR OTHER PARTNER] for that date, please don’t leave me hanging wondering what you’re thinking or how this might be fixed.

Two possible suggestions:

  1. I get [SPECIAL OCCASION DAY]. We do something special. I’m happy to offer such-and-such day(s) for you to make up for the change in plans with [YOUR OTHER PARTNER].
  2. [YOUR OTHER PARTNER] keeps [SPECIAL OCCASION DAY]. I get such-and-such day(s) and events together with you and we celebrate in [WAYS THAT WILL FILL ME UP].

Whatever you choose, I will be OK with. Because I know that double booking sucks for everyone, and I totally get that things can’t always work perfectly.

But maybe, we can work together and make it perfectly imperfect, and a time to remember, even if it’s not on [SPECIAL OCCASION DAY].

That will go a long way for me. That we get through this as a team, and communicate together, and it will help me heal.

I love you.

I love us.

Nookie

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