It all started innocently enough. It was an article posted about how to interact with people whose love language is touch.

11 Things You Need To Know Before You Date Someone Whose Love Language Is ‘Touch’

Someone mentioned this, and commented, “Yes! Just what I’ve been saying, sex is NEVER just sex.”

And that’s cool. Except that it is.

For many people.

The prevailing viewpoint of “it’s not all about sex,” is valid and important. At the same time it can imply that sex-focused kinksters are doing it wrong or setting back “the movement” or whatever.

And that’s not cool.

If you are into sex, cool.

If you’re into “more than” sex, that’s cool.

If you’re not into sex at all, that’s cool.

There is no one way to sex.

Slut shaming hurts those who enjoy sex for fun, hurts those who enjoy sex for love, and hurts those who don’t enjoy sex (because sex = love takes away their agency to love without sex).

So, let’s not do it.