So, an ad I post on CL says that there are two things I’d like to see in a first message to me:
- Face Picture (to start, after all, you’ve seen mine)
- A Note About What You Resonate Most With In This Ad
Simple, right? And yet, so many people cant seem to manage this. So, I simply write back and tell them that I’m not interested, since they didn’t provide the information I requested… I also wish them good luck.
A recent hopeful got this message and wrote back, admonishing me for ignoring the fact that he said he preferred to talk to me by phone, so that explains logically why he didn’t include the information I asked for.
He said, “I’m Far From Your Typical, Mundane Male.”
I wrote back again with the following message:
This is the last time I’ll respond.
You are making a simple logical error, and since you brought up logic, you may appreciate and learn from this.
> I’m simply tired of the usual playing over email, rather than real adult conversation. I’m sorry if you don’t understand that fact.
I do understand that. And I respect your preferences.
I stated my preferences very clearly in my ad.
Your preferences are valid. My preferences are valid. Yours are not more valid than mine, nor mine than yours, except in our own personal lives.
So, when you chose to ignore my preferences in favor of your own when responding to my ad, you made it very clear your view of the world and your lack of respect for how I do things, before you’ve even met me.
And that’s cool.
I don’t think you are a bad person. It is just very clear to me from that single message (and the rest following) that we are not a match.
> I’m far from your typical, mundane male.
According to your messages so far, you have actually placed yourself firmly in the typical, mundane male category, by thinking that somehow your expectations of me should be more important to me than my own.
Best of luck to you in everything you do.
And my self-professed far from typical, mundane male replied with the most typical, mundane response:
You read nothing I said.
Please go play with your pathetic online losers.
If you have to tell someone you are INSERT DESCRIPTION HERE, you are probably not.
- You are probably not dominant if you have to proclaim it.
- You are probably not smart if you have to proclaim it.
- You are probably not unique if you have to proclaim it.
- You are probably not creative if you have to proclaim it.
And so on.
So, why not focus more on SHOWING you are not typical and mundane, rather than telling everyone?