The most successful and sexy people I know have the strongest boundaries† and over the past few weeks I’ve been thinking about why that is.

Personal boundaries are all about keeping personal energy in, not keeping others out.

Strong boundaries are necessary for any person to be 100% authentic.

They keep energy in and keep it from leaking all over the place.

Wasting personal energy on people, events and things that really don’t matter—or worse, don’t deserve it—is an iron-clad-guaranteed way to be sure you’ll not have enough left for what really matters, and showing it.

Maintaining boundaries—learning to say “No,” take time for yourself, practice balance in life and work—means that when you really want to someone to know you care, you’ll have resources left over to make that happen.

And more importantly, you’ll have the mental and physical space to actually appreciate what you do have, and then to also show that appreciation.

† (not to be confused with the most boundaries—that’s something else entirely)