Men. Are. NOT. Trash!

Men. Are. NOT. Trash!

The OP: Men. Are. Trash. (FetLife link.)

I disagree entirely.

Men are not trash.

Women are not trash.

PEOPLE are not trash.

There are people of every gender who do not have social skills. There are people of every gender that do not play by the rules. There are people of every gender who do shocking, horrible things.

I have actually found that especially online, most people (of all genders) are reduced.

Few put the effort in to be their genuine selves on the internet. The relative anonymity combined with the extra effort of being clear in written language (which is not most people’s wheelhouse), added to the basic awkwardness/anxiety most people feel interacting with other people (especially those they don’t know) gets the better of them.

Of me, sometimes, too.

To suggest it is because of their gender, well, that’s no better than saying it’s because of their sexual orientation or their race or their socioeconomic class.

And I’m pretty sure that people understand what I mean if I were to say that “Women are trash,” or that “Black people are trash,” or “Poor people are trash,” because, well, we KNOW it’s wrong to paint an entire group of people that only for sure have one thing in common (gender identity, race, bank account balance) with the exact same brush.

Because that’s misogynistic. Or racist. Or classist. Or… well, whatever.

And yet, we feel OK doing this to men.

Specifically cis-het white men, usually, but men in general. The reasoning is that they do this so often. They cause so much harm.

True, true. Of many.

And yet, that doesn’t make it right to do it back.

To defend yourself or someone else, or even an idea? Sure.

To go on the offensive with those who have done it (in your actual knowledge) or who are doing it now?

Fuck yeah.

But ALL of them?

Nope.

Nope.

Nope.

I’m not OK with that.

Because while individuals are assholes, hatemongers, racists, misogynists, buttheads, fuck bois, twats, awkward, lame, manipulative, clueless…MEN are not.

People are not.

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On January 21, 2021, I presented the topic “The (Anti) Won Twoo Way” for Dating Kinky’s monthly show, the Nonmonogamunch. The original presentation was free

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