I have two. I joke about them, because I know when I encounter someone that falls into these two categories, I’ll just melt and go stupid.
I married one of my types. The next BF was the other.
The love of my life is not my type.
In fact, I might have discounted him totally. Because, well, he’s just so…sweet. Adorable (I’ve always preferred 3 points hotter than me, or kind of ugly with an amazing character). Boy-next-door.
Not my type.
Luckily, I managed to see past that mental block, and he managed to make it worth my while.
And I’m so, so glad.
It may not have happened, though. After all, I wasn’t looking for him. I wasn’t looking for the person he is. I had a totally different idea in my head of what my next playmate/lover/partner would look like, act like, and be.
And since he and I met, I’ve met hundreds of others.
And I still have my type, LOL!
And he is still the only exception.
But it makes me wonder what if…?
What if I’d just kept on focusing on what I thought I wanted, instead of who and what I needed in my life?
Would I have just kept having the same relationships over and over, with the same types of people, thinking that because that’s what I was attracted to, that that is what I had to make work?
And when I play on dating apps, and I’m swiping, sometimes I think about the people behind the profiles, and the extreme two-dimensionality of connecting primarily through photos and a few written words.
And how SO MANY dating apps (even OkCupid, which I used to LOVE because of their in-depth profiles) have pushed us so much into the superficial swipe culture of online dating.
I think that the way most apps are set up, we are encouraged to only see the physical, with the brains, humor, personality and so on as a distant afterthought.
And this gives me an idea for my own app that I’m now going to be playing with for late 2021…
Anyway, I don’t have answers for this to give you, although I’d love to hear your thoughts.