However, what you do will overshadow who you are to people who don’t know you, pretty much every time.

For example, I may love you dearly, and still tell you that you are being an asshole.

That doesn’t mean that you are an asshole, but that you are behaving like one, right now.

Or, I might accuse you of mansplaining, as I have recently someone in a thread. I am not suggesting anything about you as a person with that, except that you are currently the kind of person doing that behavior.

It’s not worth getting upset about being called out on behavior (although we all do it, to various degrees—it’s reflex, just try to get better at receiving that kind of information). at least, not if it’s not WHO YOU ARE.

But, it is worth examining your behavior—or at least if you don’t think it’s consistent with who you are—and determining if you are REALLY acting in alignment with your personal values.

Because that’s how you grow and become more of who you are, not just to yourself, but also to others in how you present yourself.