What do I do when I want to speak up, but I’m afraid of rejection?

I’d love to go to that kinky event, but I have no one to go with me.

I’ve put myself out there, and I’ve been insulted over and over. I’m afraid of doing it again.

I’ve gotten comments like this, messages, had these conversations…

My reply is always:

Do it, anyway.

Because, if you’re going to be ostracized, at least you’ve spoken your truth.

If you’re going to be insulted, at least be insulted over what you believe in.

If your going to be alone, at least be alone where you have a CHANCE of meeting new people and having fun.

If you’re going to be humiliated, insulted, hazed, or whatever, at least you can also do what you believe is right.

Doing it anyway gives you the chance of authentically connecting with others who feel the same way you do about those things, people who also go to events alone, or who speak up about things they believe in. Who keep trying, even when it seems like everyone is against them.

Find your tribe. The people who agree with your view of the world—or who at least agree that your view of the world is as valid as theirs.

And, possibly, if you continue to get negative feedback, consider taking a close look at how you communicate. Perhaps there is something that you are doing (unwittingly) that is rubbing others the wrong way.

And you can learn that best from doing it and paying attention to the reactions you get in return, and possibly modifying your delivery. Sure, content should mean more than presentation. The problem is, without presentation, some people will never hear your content. Sad, but true.

And if you don’t do it at all, your chance of being heard is reduced to zero.

Yes, I know it’s nerve-wracking.

I know it’s scary.

I know there are people out there who just live to spew nastiness.

I totally understand everything you’re saying. I’ve been there. And the thing that made the biggest difference for me?

I did it, anyway.