How do I know what my kinks are?
In the words of Cole Porter:
Be curious
Though interfering friends may frown
Get furious
At each attempt to hold you down
If this advice you always employ
The future can offer you infinite joy
And merriment
Experiment
And you’ll see.
That’s actually about the best advice I have.
Try what interests you.
How do you know what interests you? Go over the the Map of Human Sexuality by Franklin Veaux, or the kink checklist, or pick random things that you find and research them.
Then try them.
Try them once, more than once, a hundred times. Try them with different people, in different situations.
Try things that interest your partner.
Play with them.
Read about them, think about them, talk about them. Find YOU inside the ideas of what you’re exploring. Determine a starting place, and a few rules or safety precautions.
Then, experiment.
