“Love hurts!”
“I’ll never love again.”
“It’s stupid to trust people.”
What I’m reading here is that these people are willing to allow one person (or possibly multiple people) to take away any chance they have at experiencing one of the most amazing feelings this world has to offer us.
Deep, intimate, passionate love.
They are willing to let that one experience (or handful of experiences) remove thousands of possibilities from their lives.
Just like that.
Now, most who know me already know my personal feelings on the topic of whether love hurts or not:
But you know what, I’m cool with you believing that love hurts.
So the fuck what? LOTS of things hurt.
- Paper cuts hurt. We don’t stop using paper.
- Stubbing our toes hurt. We don’t stop walking.
- The high-speed internet bill hurts every fucking month like clockwork, and yet, we still keep surfing YouPorn and RedTube.
- Taking a bite of hot pizza hurts like a motherfucker, and it’s still so gawddamned good!
Why?
Because the risks outweigh the rewards.
That’s the problem. Us humans have a tendency to focus on what we can lose. It’s how our silly lizard brains work.
But lizard brains are about surviving. Not thriving.
And they don’t factor in what we could gain by taking that perceived risk or what it truly costs us to play it safe.
Sure, you can choose to never love again, and if that works, you’ll be safe from that hurt.
You’ll also miss out on the potential for amazing joy, happiness, warmth, and intimacy, because you’re not allowing it in.
Or… you’ll allow dozens, maybe hundreds of opportunities to go by, and your brain and heart will get sick of your shit and gang up against you, and take the biggest, dumbest, most ill-considered, bone-headed risk ever, and you’ll fall madly, head-over-heels in love with entirely the wrong person for you, with all of your crappy attitudes and fears towards love intact, and sitting right next to all of those relationship bad habits and crappy skills, and you’ll veer headlong into the crash-and-burn of self-fulfilling prophecy, so you can say…
“Love hurts!”
All over again.
